Pajama Empress

Ha, what an absolute riot. After my last post of proclaiming how independent I feel, I am finding myself pining. Badly. After he hasn’t been very nice to me, which makes me even more pathetic. So in summary, I am pining from a distance; scared to make myself emotionally vulnerable to more ridiculousness, but at the same time really, really missing him (he only spends about 7 hours a day at home, solely for sleeping), which is making me do ridiculous things, like spending 7 hours making him a paper sculpture, and doing his university assignment, et cetera.

Blah. I hate being so pathetic. But not entirely pathetic; seems I may have managed to score a job. An enjoyable job, selling things I actually like, in a central location, et cetera. At The Body Shop. I’m not completely sure if it is a job they are offering, or just a trial; tomorrow I’ll find out. I am terribly nervous though. Since recent events, I feel so much more shy and apprehensive – before now I just assumed that I was capable of whatever I put my mind to. But I have limits, I am not as strong as I should be, and it will take a long time before I’ll be as capable as I wish I was. But until then, I’m not going to push myself into a hole again.

In other news, I took the plunge. I bought something from Etsy. Two things actually, shh! One is a supply-thing I need for Violonjello, and the other is a belt I have been coveting for a while now – a wide white elastic waist-cinching belt with a little frill and a silver clasp. It is designed by the magical Melbourne couturier Samantha Sultana; I simply need to buy some of her headbands. I’m planning to wear the belt and some sort of awesome dress (I have a white one in mind) to closing night of The Wedding Singer… it’s a pride thing; I wasn’t cast in the show, I have to look so amazingly gorgeous as to make the entire cast feel inferior when I am faced with them again. Oh, how I love spite.